Tory Whanau Considered Quitting Wellington Mayoralty While ‘Humiliated’

Nick
James, Reporter

Tory Whanau has opened up
about how she seriously considered quitting the mayoralty,
being “humiliated in front of the whole country” and
fighting the patriarchy.

The Wellington mayor has
faced several challenges – both political and personal –
during her time in the Capital’s top job.

These
included her admitting
to a drinking problem in 2023, and some policies she’s
championed have not gone her way.

Last year she
revealed that she had been diagnosed
with ADHD.

Whanau had committed
to running for the role again at this year’s upcoming
local body elections.

Whanau spoke at Ginger’s Lesbian
Pop-Up Event centred on celebrating LGBTQIA+ wāhine and
people on International Women’s Day, which took place after
pride celebrations in Wellington over the weekend.

The
ticketed public event included a panel with the mayor,
sports journalist Alice Soper, former Football Fern Māia
Jackman MNZM and media expert Cassie Roma.

In video
footage posted on social media Whanau said over the past two
years she had considered quitting.

“I was just like
f… this, you know? It just got so hard, and I felt like no
matter what I did this group, minority, were just trying to
tear me down.”

Whanau said she then spent time with
her family, iwi and focused on her wairua.

“That
became kind of like the thing… it doesn’t matter how much
negativity there is, it’s hideous, family, my identity, who
I am is the most important thing.”

She detailed the
experience of instances of her drinking being shared with
the public.

“There’s nothing quite like being
humiliated in front of the whole country for getting pissed,
you know?”

She told the crowd that after battling
public challenges she got herself well – including taking
hormone replacement therapy and being connected to her
iwi.

“I feel great, and thankfully for the last two
years it has given me a thick skin, and so it would almost
be a tragedy to step down and not be a voice for those who
may not have a thick skin right now.”

She said the
crowd should try their best to harness resilience from where
they can.

“The patriarchy want us to stay down and we
can’t let them.”

In
a statement to RNZ Whanau said she had been very open about
challenges she had faced as a public figure and how she
dealt with them.

“To support Pride and International
Women’s Day, I had the privilege of connecting with members
of the rainbow community in an intimate setting last
weekend.

“I spoke candidly about my experience as
Wellington’s first Māori wahine Mayor, focusing on
resilience and personal growth. I think it is important to
share these experiences so others can learn from them and
hopefully, they will help them in their own personal
journeys.”

Organiser and panellist Cassie Roma told
RNZ Whanau was speaking as an ally to the LGBTQIA+
community.

“In a time in which diversity and inclusion
seem to be falling behind in the minds of cultures,
communities, business and government, it was important that
we had the voice of a strong ally to speak on the
panel.

“Tory was there not only as a political figure,
but as a human being sharing her own stories and supporting
our community.”

Roma said to give context to her
comments she did not say she was quitting.

“In fact
the crux of her commentary was that she was stronger than
ever now that she has understanding around her whakapapa,
neurodiversity, and the intersectional way in which she and
her constituents move through the world.”

She said
Whanau spoke about everything from perimenopause to
resilience to diversity of thought.

“What I took away
from her comments on the panel in context was that she is
more than ever willing and able to stand up for those whose
voices aren’t often heard.”

Roma told RNZ the mayor
was authentic and vulnerable.

“The comments on the
video without context would be misread by many – especially
those looking for some kind of audacious or inflammatory
comment.”

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